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To Clarify

May 10, 2006 by Kathryn

When I read about Piglet being blown away, I wonder what gauge weapon will be used and who will be wielding it. Eyeore seems the most unstable mentally, although Rabbit has shown himself capable of physical aggression in the past. Kanga is right out, but Roo wants so badly to fit in. Who’s to say that he’s not planning the job, maybe earn him some respect from the whole gang? They all made nice at the end of The Heffalump Movie but I think that book

piglet

is pretty solid evidence of the rising tide of violence in their little world. Christo-Robinizzle is too high up in the food chain to take anyone out himself. He’d undoubtedly use one of his henchmen. I don’t think it would be too hard to convince T-I-double-Guh-ER to “bounce” little pink, if you knowahmsayin’. After that whole forgery of documents and posing as a member of his long lost Tigger posse, in The Tigger Movie, our boy is not exactly right with Mr. T. At least the Pooh’s got his back… for now.

Got any theories, yo?

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Previous Post: « Of Piglet and Prophecy
Next Post: Shhh….We’re Hunting Houses – Updated »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Margaret says

    May 11, 2006 at 12:19 am

    Remind me NEVER to conspire against you.

    Or play “Clue” with you.

    Or “Mafia.”

  2. meredith says

    May 11, 2006 at 2:08 am

    Tigger is a naughty tiger, he’s been caught in a lie before, he’s my suspect.

  3. Jeana says

    May 11, 2006 at 4:13 am

    Oh my word! I got the reference yesterday and thought that was funny. Reading this I could not stop laughing. Daring Young Mom waxes gangsta-esque. Izzle. YOu didn’t mention Owl, the brains of the posse. Maybe he’s still bitter after being called an egg-head in school. AND he’s the only one who knows how to write, so he could totally arrange it for hire. Or even mail-order an Uzzi. Which I could not, because I have no idea is I just spelled that right.

    And we know he has it in for Piglet, remember how he found that house for Eeyore and really it was Piglet’s house so then Piglet had to go mooch off of Pooh? After his plot to put Pinky on the street failed he was bound to have a vendetta.

  4. KEP says

    May 11, 2006 at 5:19 am

    Or Gopher? He seems to have a lot of pent-up aggression as well.

  5. Cheerio's on my butt? says

    May 11, 2006 at 5:59 am

    Yeah I think gopher because he’s from the underground and stuff. He also looooves to blow stuff up! He’s the man to do the job!

  6. Peter says

    May 11, 2006 at 6:25 am

    I don’t trust any of them. They all seem a little bit off to me.

  7. Heth says

    May 11, 2006 at 6:42 am

    Another vote for Gopher. He gets a little crazy with the dynamite.

  8. The Flip Flop Mamma! says

    May 11, 2006 at 6:43 am

    You know, it’s always the quiet ones that break mamma’s heart. Do I dare say Pooh himself? sometimes it’s the one you’d least expect. He says he’s trying to help him keep from being “blown away,” I think we have a little O.J action here.

  9. The Flip Flop Mamma! says

    May 11, 2006 at 6:44 am

    Oh, where is Nantie Meg? I’m a little concerned! Haven’t heard from her since 4-26!

  10. Tess says

    May 11, 2006 at 6:51 am

    What Piglet didn’t know is when they were asking him what size shoes he wears, they were making a mold for his concrete shoes

  11. jess says

    May 11, 2006 at 7:48 am

    That little pig better watch his back, Dog. I’ve heard that OWL may be packing a little heat.

  12. fantasy man says

    May 11, 2006 at 7:57 am

    uzi

  13. melnel says

    May 11, 2006 at 8:01 am

    This is a scarey post for me, since I’ve always identified myself with piglet.

    The whole thing just leaves me with a feeling that someone is out to get me!

  14. Heather says

    May 11, 2006 at 8:10 am

    I’d have to go for Gopher. That gopher is one shady character.

  15. ABC Momma says

    May 11, 2006 at 8:17 am

    Rabbit–he’s always trying to get rid of little pests.

  16. Goslyn says

    May 11, 2006 at 9:15 am

    I’m going with Rabbit – I can’t believe ABC momma was the first to suggest him! He was my first pick, right off. He’s so anal-retentive. He’d probably off piglet just to get back at Pooh for getting stuck in his (rabbit’s) house. How’s that for vengence. Eat my hunny, I blow away your little buddy.

  17. Aunt Murry says

    May 11, 2006 at 11:13 am

    It was POOH! The dunb thing is all an act!!!!

  18. a. nonny spouse says

    May 11, 2006 at 11:20 am

    For the true aspiring gangsta: Gizoogle.

  19. Amy says

    May 11, 2006 at 12:40 pm

    Somebody rent this woman a grown-up DVD and fast! 🙂

  20. Lei says

    May 11, 2006 at 1:28 pm

    I have no idea what you are getting at… 😉 Lol. If only children’s entertainment WERE that interesting!

  21. Susan says

    May 11, 2006 at 1:52 pm

    As I read this, I am sitting with my sick child watching the Book of Pooh video he picked out at the Blockbuster. You know, the Book of Pooh, where the characters are all computer rendered puppets.

    They look like a gang. And now I’m freaked out.

  22. Nettie says

    May 11, 2006 at 1:55 pm

    Remember when Rabbit tried to lose Tigger in the woods? I think its him. But I wouldn’t rule out ‘Ol Cris Robbin. After all, he does head up the stairs, “draggin’ Pooh behind him.” (That line always cracks my kids up!)

  23. Nettie says

    May 11, 2006 at 1:55 pm

    This post has been removed by the author.

  24. Jeff says

    May 11, 2006 at 2:14 pm

    It was the woozles.

  25. shannon from rocks in my dryer says

    May 11, 2006 at 2:25 pm

    can’t. type. laughing. too. hard.

  26. Praying for your Prodigal says

    May 11, 2006 at 2:57 pm

    All I can offer….is….

    Oh–bother!

    Diane

  27. Shalee says

    May 11, 2006 at 3:06 pm

    Hil.ar.i.ous!

    I think Eeyore will do everyone in… He’s like the Unibomber… all by himself, in a shack in the woods… you know the one who seems a little too down and then one day he can’t live with himself or anyone else anymore so at the next “Hooray for Pooh” party that Christopher throws, he pulls out a gunner and blows them all away, finally turning the weapon on himself.

    It’s messy, but everyone knows that he only had fluff for brains.

  28. elliespen says

    May 11, 2006 at 4:42 pm

    Good. Grief.

    All y’all are forgetting that our Piglet can take care of himself. He manages to escape the flood, he foils any and all attempts to send him away on a kite, he evades a jagular (who now has got his back), he has that suspiciously abbreviated “Trespassers Will” sign above his house, he does NOT go missing in the mist, and (for those of you who have read the book) he bravely takes on Roo’s identity in the great kidnapping plot.

    I think EEYORE needs to watch his back more than my fine pink friend.

    It’s already started, actually. Remember when Piglet was being the kite? He managed to drag Pooh through Eeyore’s house of sticks and knock it down, while he gave Rabbit a hand by harvesting his carrots for him. Obviously Rabbit and Piglet are cronies, while Eeyore and Owl represent the opposing gang (Eeyore got even by giving Owl Piglet’s house) — and our bear of very little brain seems to be an unsuspecting pawn in this dangerous game.

  29. No Cool Story says

    May 11, 2006 at 5:49 pm

    Hundred Acre Wood Mafia = Gopher

    Hey DYM, I’m glad you’re still alive
    and bloging away (because you know, I LOVE your blog).

    Now all we have to do is wait for your house NOT to fall down. Or Gopher to come git ya.

  30. helene says

    May 11, 2006 at 7:29 pm

    Hi –Just delurking to invite you to add your tradecard to the Supermom Gallery
    http://hlb.blogspot.com

  31. EvaRob says

    May 11, 2006 at 7:44 pm

    Agree with previous posters. It is SO Eeyore…he freaks me out….he’s such a downer in that crazy honey filled town.

  32. Dapoppins says

    May 12, 2006 at 6:48 am

    I drop by and see that there is a hit out on P-p-piglet!” I think it is Rabit, he is the one who tries to loose Tigger, he is also the one behind all the huffalump trap building and he has expierence battleing cops, or is that crops? He is a jittery bunny but he’s got the nerve…

  33. Lauren says

    May 12, 2006 at 10:28 am

    I can NOT even believe that Pooh and the gang went this bad in just the few years that I’ve stopped reading them to the kids. What’s this world coming to? *sigh*

  34. momof3busyboys says

    May 12, 2006 at 1:54 pm

    I am sitting here laughing So hard I got tears coming down my cheeks!
    I have got to say My theory says it is Eyore who has it out for piglet! He is so quiet, and I agree it is always the loners that are profiled on all the cop shows as maniac killers!

  35. Lianne says

    May 12, 2006 at 4:11 pm

    Thank you for referring to the “real” Pooh and not Disney’s caricature of Pooh.

    I was thinking, wouldn’t it be funny to have Pooh Oracle Cards, or something. Everyday you could pull some “message” from them like:

    “Today looks like it holds trouble for you, you’d better stay home with your honey pot.”

    I’m thinking I might be on to something and I could make millions bastardizing A.A. Milne just like Disney!

    What a cynic I am!

  36. Not Too Pensive says

    May 12, 2006 at 7:25 pm

    I wonder what gauge weapon will be used and who will be wielding it

    My theory? You’ve spent too much time with your brother…

  37. emlouisa says

    May 12, 2006 at 8:36 pm

    Okay. Thanks for making me snort popcorn up my nose. Do you KNOW how painful that is?

  38. Heather from One Woman's World says

    May 13, 2006 at 8:26 am

    mwahaha! You are too hilarious!

  39. Anonymous says

    May 13, 2006 at 3:38 pm

    Can’t beleive nobody has said it yet…

    wait for it….

    A frickin’ twelve-gauge what do you think!!! Gosh!!!

    Adam

  40. LammyAnn says

    May 14, 2006 at 12:17 pm

    COMMENT #40~~ Happy mother’s day to one of the greatest!
    Hugs
    (oh, and Love me some a.a.milne in gangstah)

  41. Pam in Utah says

    May 14, 2006 at 10:34 pm

    Kathryn, Happy Mother’s Day to a most sweet and good mother. Funny, too. 🙂 Uh, yuup.

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