Dan and I are a tad twisted. We are also literate and we have children. We like to read to them. We also encourage them to yell “helloooo” down storm drains to the imaginary people and piranhas who have made the sewer their home, but that’s neither here nor there.
I love how Dan always announces the title, author and illustrator before each story he reads. If none is listed, he’ll simply say, “Bunny Bedtime, by Nobody.” This makes me giggle every time. I also really really like it when he finds hidden meanings in the text. I’ve mentioned this before.
Recently Dan was reading Bunny Bedtime by Nobody.
Hop away, hop away fast little bunnies. You have no idea what subtle horror awaits you just a few short pages away.
Dan reads it this way: “Little bunnies are ready to eat. Fresh from the oven, they taste delicious in a stew.”
Personally, I think it’s inappropriate to write about bunnies being “ready to eat,” in a story intended for very young children. It’s a BOARD BOOK, for heck’s sake! It looks to me like they’re giving the rabbits treats just to fatten them up. Sickening. There are children reading this.
But don’t worry. I’ve got a sharpie and I’m not afraid to follow Strong Bad’s example and do some creative editing. Maybe the bunnies could be “ready to love,” “ready to take to the library,” or “ready to dress up in human clothing and lose all personal dignity doing a cute cuddly calendar photo shoot.”
Who doesn’t love the thought of a wittle bunny in designer jeans, suspenders and a ball cap? Hopefully no one who reads this blog.