Don’t you love it when you’re right? Like when you tell everyone “This baby seems really big.”
Everyone: Yes, everyone says that.
You: No, this time it’s different.
Everyone: The second time people always think the baby’s bigger.
You: No, I have stretch marks from my knees to my lower lip and can hardly walk.
Everyone: Uh-huh, yes. That’s what they say.
Everyone: Oh, my! He’s stuck in the birth canal, he’s really wedged in there. This baby might be larger then we thought.
Everyone: OH! Get some help. We may have to break some bones to get him out.
Everyone: Why didn’t we know he’d be this big? This kid is 10 Â½ lbs!!!
Not that this happened to me 4 months ago or anything. I’m just saying. Anyway, today was also a day of vindication. Since Big-O was born, I’ve been telling everyone that he looks a lot like my dad but no one believed me. I can understand this because my dad is 5’11’, a fairly big guy and wears a full rugged beard. Big-O is 27”, ”˜only’ weighs 18lbs and never even needs to shave. However, I knew that behind all that hair, my dad was hiding a face that very much resembled my son.
So today for the first time in years, my dad shaved his beard clean off. As he caught his own reflection in the mirror, he said, “Wow, I look like Big-O!”
In some sad vindication news:
Dan is always telling me to follow the instructions and not sleep with the heating pad on. When he says this, what I hear is, “Yadda yadda blah blah, I’m afraid of burning myself on a lukewarm piece of plastic covered in a protective flannel blanket.” Well, sadly he was vindicated today when my mom called to say she had burned her back on her heating pad. The burns are so bad that large blisters have formed, the last one popping painfully as we spoke. Ummmm……guess I was wrong……for once……how big was that baby again?