Drops of Awesome

Personal Blog of Author Kathryn Thompson

Archives for December 2009

Holiday Movie Readiness Questionnaire

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We’ve been showing the kids our favorite Christmas movies. Most have been smashing successes. Home Alone, although funny to Laylee, came across as a total horror movie to Magoo. If you’re planning on watching it with your little ones this holiday season, please ask yourself the following.

1. Is your child afraid of abandonment and/or being left alone with no parental support for days on end?
2. Do you like the idea of your child watching another child yell, “I hate you,” to his parents?
3. Is your child afraid of the dark or afraid of murderers with bloody hands, large menacing shovels and trashcans full of salt that turn their victims’ bodies into mummies?
4. Do you want to give your child 100 different ideas for ways to destroy your house?
5. Is your child sensitive to watching another child being ignored, bullied, belittled, yelled at and in all other ways verbally abused?
6. Do you want to teach your child an important lesson about organized crime back in the days of black and white, where a mobster will count to 10 (incorrectly) before “pumping your guts full of lead” with a loud and terrifying round of blasts from a machine gun, while smoking a cigar and emitting an evil cackle over your lifeless body?
7. Does your child ever suffer from nightmares that “bad guys” are roaming the streets plotting ways to break into your house?
8. Do you want your child to suffer from those nightmares?
9. Do you want to explain what a porn stash is?
10. Do you want to explain what the phrase “French babes don’t shave their pits” means?
11. Are you looking for a good way to talk to your children about shoplifting and/or vandalism?

Luckily Laylee was old enough to discern the difference between a funny bad guy and a scary bad guy. Luckily I’m pretty quick with a mute button. But seriously, what was funny when I was 12 is not so much of funny when I’m the mother of a 4-year-old. I’ve got to prescreen these things.

Howling Holidays

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Between bouts of illness, we had about 24 hours to squeeze in some fun last weekend. The planets aligned just in time for us to head out on a short vacation to the Great Wolf Lodge in Grand Mound, WA. They were hosting a special blogger event with discounted pricing and a blogger breakfast meet-up and we couldn’t pass up the chance to go back there. We had so much fun the last time.
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This time they were promoting their Snowland experience, the lodge decorated from top to bottom with snowflakes, sparkles and lights. Santa was there and a few times a day they did a “holiday show” and had a real fake indoor snowfall. Of course it also still had wolves and things that are great and lodge-like things. Hence the name.

gwl5I’m a big fan of Great Wolf Lodge. I love the way my kids’ gray matter explodes when we go there. They can’t put into words how much fun they’re having but they keep spontaneously giggling and their faces are split into ridiculous half-insane grins the entire time. Since we got home, Magoo’s been saying “Thank you for the Great Wolf Lodge,” every single night in his prayers. I also really like that all the employees, no matter what their job title, greet you and make eye contact when they see you in the halls.

There were a few things I don’t like. I don’t like this:
GWL
The check-in line was insane. It’s nice that business is so good at the Lodge but they need to find a more efficient way to process all those visitors.

I’m also not a fan of animatronics.
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We missed the nightly story time last year because we were frolicking in the water. This year we were sure to dry off and get there in time for what turned out to be sort of an underwhelming, hard to hear, semi-creepy animatronics extravaganza followed by a real live story time. The kids enjoyed it but I think they would have been happier in the water. I know I would have.
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Wanda shocked us all by tolerating the whole experience quite well. Being inside the water park itself was like stepping into a giant white-noise machine and put her quickly to sleep. She was warm enough in her little swimmy suit with a towel wrapped around her and in a year she’ll be having a blast in the kiddy area. Her only trouble came late that night when everyone else was sleeping and she wanted me to stay up and rock her on the couch while watching Jeopardy on mute.

You know how unfulfilling it is to watch Jeopardy on mute and never know if your answers are right? What is – VERY frustrating? Luckily within minutes of starting that late night ritual I got a text from one of my blogging mom friends who was hanging out with some of our ladies down in the restaurant. They’d all put their children away and were enjoying some nocturnal girl time. They took turns passing Wanda around until she was zonked and I headed back upstairs and put her to bed. It was lovely and much more fun than mute Jeopardy.

Overall I’d still recommend taking a trip to a GWL if you have one near you. Your kids are guaranteed to have an awesome time and you’ll likely enjoy yourself too, especially if you like your children. Personally, I’d rather go when they’re back to doing what they do best without all the plasticky holiday noise. I don’t really want my kids to associate Christmas with lavish water parks and crazed animatronic moose and trees singing carols. I guess I’d rather have them associate it with storm troopers and old dead artificial foliage.

Read my other review for more details on why we’ll likely be back. Also – a tip – pay for the buffet for one meal and then bring the rest of your food from home. The restaurant was okay but nothing fabulous and it’s worth the money to watch your kids freak out over the sheer volume of choices they have to choose from in the buffet.

Click to Read My Product Review Policy

Death and Dying

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The tree’s body lay on the living room floor for about 24 hours before I performed some drastic surgery with a cordless drill and some photo-hanging wire, restoring just enough of its health to prolong its life through the Christmas season.

While the tree was getting better, Wanda and I were getting worse.

My throat hurts. I have an earache. Wanda is coughing and sputtering like a hoopty old car with a hairball. Her nose is full of fluids and so is her eardrum. She has her first ear infection. So, at less than three months of age, she’s starting her first round of antibiotics. Yippee!
waiting-for-drugs
I’ll tell you this though, she’s the jolliest little sick person I’ve ever known. She will cough, sputter, splurk and sneeze and then look up at me with her little red eyes and grin. Makes my whining seem a little pathetic. My nose isn’t even running. I just don’t feel good. It’s kind of sad when you have to look at your infant for advice on coping skills.

Dan’s been fighting a sinus infection for weeks.

Magoo’s got an on-again/off-again relationship with a nasty cough and a fat boogie nose.

I’m fighting a sore throat.

Wanda’s rocking her cold and ear infection.

Laylee is the last man standing. I’m just waiting for her to come down with a mild case of the ebola virus.

Christmas Tree Carnage

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Sometimes you have to face facts. Sometimes your fake Christmas tree is just dead. You should not try to resuscitate it. You should not try to meld the stand back together with Super Glue. You may end up gluing your fingers to the tree and then to each other while the tree lies lifelessly in a pool of its own ornaments on the baby’s tummy-time blanket.

A $20 fake Christmas tree from Rite-Aid does not owe you anything. After 5 years of service, sometimes it’s best just to say, “Thanks. It’s been a good ride. Ho Ho Ho Croak.”

tree-down

Parent/Teachers

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I love parent/teacher conference time. I’ve loved it since I was a kid. As an elementary school student I enjoyed talking to my parents when they came home with glowing reports of my academic and social excellence. As a keener and a hard core pleaser, there was nothing I liked more than to hear about how much my teacher liked me and exactly which ways I was exceeding her wildest expectations for a student of my age and station.

Now I like conferences and progress reports for a slightly different reason. [read more at Parenting.com]