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How to Spaz out your Betta Fish…and What Kathryn Needs

October 13, 2005 by Kathryn

So Karli dropped by some chocolates yesterday to increase my health and my pants size. While she was over, she showed me a cool trick. If you hold a mirror up to your Betta fish, he thinks its a rival fishy and starts fritzing out. He puffs up and paces back and forth, eventually “attacking” the new fish by ramming himself into the glass. This is mean, but a fascinating experiment.

I woke up this morning and informed Laylee that I was still sick (its mostly in my lungs now and I’m totally grossed out by “hawking it up” so it may stay there a while. Dan has tried teaching me how to do this several times but I always end up gagging and yorching. I know, TMI). Anyway, I was smiling when I told her so she asked, “Are your eyes happy but your body is sick?” So cute. What kind of genius is she? Then she asked, “Can you PLEASE get better today?” Well, ma’am, I sure hope so but since I’m on day 4 I will at least try to go on with life as usual.

Here’s a quick meme for fun. I feel like I’m always the last to find these but if you haven’t already done it, let me know if you find any good ones.

Do a google search with your first name and the word needs all in quotes. Example: “Kathryn needs” Then find the funniest results. Here are a few of mine:

“Kathryn needs help with toileting”
“Kathryn needs to know ASAP”
“Kathryn needs to avoid to[o] great a consumption of these. Ostrich.”
“Kathryn needs James to help her win the Great Centennial Race because she needs the $50K prize”
“Kathryn needs to go down for her first nap 3 hours after wakening and go down for her 2nd nap….”
“Kathryn needs a husband to save her”
“Kathryn needs to be self motivated, organized and able to get on with a wide range of people of differing ages”
“Kathryn needs to have more chances to weigh in”
“‘Miss Carter, anytime Kathryn needs correcting, you just correct her.'”
“Well for starters, Kathryn needs relationships”
“All Kathryn needs now is another blind date”
“Kathryn needs your help!”
“Kathryn needs to execute her plan to stop the train very precisely, because if she miscalculates, she will be launching fully loaded freight cars all over the city.”
“Kathryn needs time in the sun.”
“Kathryn needs to run some errands or just plain get out of the house”

Amen!

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Previous Post: « Some Humor from my House of Sickness
Next Post: Lawyers and Annoying Things »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Meg says

    October 13, 2005 at 11:23 am

    Megan Needs a theme song

    Megan Needs Help

    Megan Needs a home (the best part is the headline “Stranger Danger for Nervy Dog Megan”

    Megan needs a complete redo of her bedroom to make it more “Miami.”

    Those are just a few 🙂

  2. Meg says

    October 13, 2005 at 11:24 am

    Oh, I just found this one

    Megan needs a makeover: “Megan has no style”

  3. Yummy London Mummy says

    October 13, 2005 at 1:01 pm

    I don’t have a fish, but now I’m tempted to get one… sounds like a fun anger displacement exercise! 🙂

    Thanks for stopping by my blog. Get better soon.

  4. Heather says

    October 13, 2005 at 3:24 pm

    Turns out I have needs, too!

    Love you.

    Heather doesn’t need two mommies. Heather needs a childhood.
    Heather Needs Two Therapists.
    Heather needs a variety of intellectual pursuits.
    Heather needs to find the right balance between emotions and logic.
    Heather requires a lot of attention and would probably do best as an only child.
    Heather needs a family who will commit to her one hundred percent.
    Dad said that Heather needs to start wearing a brassiere.

  5. Kathryn says

    October 13, 2005 at 3:32 pm

    Aren’t these so fun?

  6. Dan says

    October 13, 2005 at 6:38 pm

    Dan needs a new Car.
    Dan needs to overcome himself…
    dan needs the love too, y’all.
    Dan needs a new home page.
    DAn needs a haircut.
    Dan needs help with visibility.
    We have some real differences of opinion about Dan’s needs.
    Dan – needs-the-most-work ‘stache.
    I agree that Dan needs a haircut.
    I sure don’t blame them for deciding that Dan needs a stunt double in the bus.
    Dan needs clear limits and consistency along with positive reinforcement and attention.
    Dan needs to make money because how would he pay for all those trips in Ukraine otherwise.
    Before refinancing Dan needs to consider his personality type.
    The hair, yeh, teh Dan needs to work on hair.
    Dan needs to work on back width and although his posing routine showed enthusiasm he needs to work on showing his physique to its best.
    We have some real differences of opinion about Dan’s needs.

  7. Kelly says

    October 13, 2005 at 8:47 pm

    i posted my needs on my blog.
    boy was that search creepy.

  8. Kim C. says

    October 14, 2005 at 5:57 am

    Those are tough fish!
    We set our betas side by side in separate tanks, and one actually jumped out of his tank, through a tiny hole into the other tank. We witnessed it!
    We also had our cat knock down a tank from the top of a 6′ bookshelf while we were gone. When we came home we found shattered glass and all the water was gone (lapped up, or had it been done hours ago?). The fish was found later in a corner, in sticky ball of cat hair and dust bunnies…alive…

  9. adam says

    October 14, 2005 at 7:32 am

    this was sooo fun!!
    Adam Needs a Shower…petition
    Adam needs to limit his drinking
    “”firm rules
    “”new books
    “”a printer

    A few of my favorites
    love you guys

  10. Brooke says

    October 17, 2005 at 2:58 pm

    Calling all hunks, Brooke needs you.

    Brooke needs some serious counseling.

    Brooke needs to wake up before its too late.

    And I stopped at that….

  11. Anna says

    October 18, 2005 at 7:27 pm

    I love this game! Unfortunately, everyone thinks I need a slap, since my real name’s Caryn, and there’s apparently an unpopular woman on Survivor with that name/spelling. Not good for the ego, I’ll tell you!

  12. ~Kathryn~ says

    October 27, 2005 at 6:39 am

    hey kathryn from another kathryn !! found your blog while doing my own ‘kathryn needs’ … well actually i found your sisters blog .. did you buy her chocolate yet ??

  13. crunchyfroggie says

    May 23, 2006 at 11:20 pm

    I was looking for “Kathryn needs” and found your blog. 🙂 A fellow Kathryn! Yay!
    My friend Kathleen got some brilliant answers. So did Rachel for that matter. 🙂

  14. Anonymous says

    May 25, 2006 at 3:54 pm

    Hey Kathryn…this is another Kathryn (from Down Under) who found your blog through the “Kathryn Needs…” thing. Hilarious! And now I don’t need to research anymore cause you’ve done it all for me!
    Curious to know if you also need help toileting?? lol

  15. Kathryn says

    May 30, 2006 at 7:56 pm

    hey fellow kathryn’s… i’m another from down under and thanks heaps for your blog! 😀 its been great talking! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!

  16. Anonymous says

    June 1, 2006 at 2:53 am

    bec needs statistics

  17. The Lazy Organizer says

    July 17, 2006 at 11:25 am

    1. Lara needs to use stealth just as much as she does combat maneuvers and jumps (I do need to work on this. I can’t even close my baby’s window at night without waking her up. It took her an hour to talk herself back to sleep.)
    2. Lara needs new breasts! (I think my husband agrees with this)
    3. Tough Girl Lara Needs Armed Bodyguards (If I’m so tough, why the body guards?)
    4. Lara needs to get a life. Lara needs to practice her trumpet now that her lips have decided to calm down. Lara is depressed. (I do need a life but I don’t know why my trumpet playing is making me so depressed.)
    5. Lara needs to be reprimanded (For so many reasons)
    6. Lara needs an archenemy to fight against (Can’t we just all get along?)
    7. Lara needs to interact with her environment to solve a puzzle (Does this mean I have to get off the internet?)
    8. Lara needs a lot more than a decent story if her games are going to find acceptance (It sounds like people aren’t buying my lies anymore.)
    9. Lara needs no lessons on tact or diplomacy from anyone (That’s right!)
    10. I think Lara needs a few days to cry at home (I’ve been doing that all week. What I need is to get to the gym!)
    11. Lara needs to move boxes from one side of a giant balance to the other (Are they talking about my garage here?)

  18. Anonymous says

    August 11, 2006 at 2:01 am

    Kathryns r da bomb!!!!!!!!

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