Laylee sits next to me tapping and making alarmingly loud sucking and hocking noises.
I politely ask her to stop.
The noises continue.
I yell, “HEY!!!!”
She looks at me innocently. “Why hey, Mamma?”
I am dumbfounded. “WHY HEY?” I respond.
“I’m serious. Why hey?”
She was also serious today in the pediatrician’s office when she placed her hands on her chest and said, “See these pointy parts. These are my breasts.” She then gently cupped my own mammaries and said, “These are your breasts. They are much lower than mine. When I get big and old like you my chest will go down SO LOW too.”
The truth is out. I no longer have the body of a four-year-old. I did not feel inclined to explain that her four-year-old body was partially to blame for my general lack of perkishness. WHY HEY? Why indeed.