When I am sick, I am often irritable. When I am irritable, I am often snippy. When I am snippy, I am often embarrassed or annoyed by my children repeating phrases of my snippidity over and over and over again.
Tonight Magoo was whining, part of his teething ritual. Laylee was also whining and saying my name over and over and over again and asking me to do impossible tasks. “Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Please put this 10’X10’ blanket into my purse the size of a sandwich baggie.” “Please. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy.”
I think that’s why we all just tell them our name is Mommy and keep our real identity a secret for as long as possible. We don’t want to grow to hate our own names.
Amdist all this whining, I was stomping around the house looking for some important papers I’d misplaced during my days of pathetic sickness. My two-year-old stalker was hot on my heels and I turned to her and said, “You’d better leave me alone now or Mommy is going to HAVE A COW.”
Laylee: Are you going to have a cow, Mommy?
Laylee (delighted): OH! Can I have a cow too Mommy?
Me: Sure. I think you already are.
Laylee: Can Magoo have a cow too Mommy? How about Daddy? Can Daddy have a cow?
Me(madly shuffling through papers): Yes, we can all have a cow. Let’s everybody have a cow. Yippee! It’s cow time. Let’s all have a big fat cow.
Laylee(very excited): O-KAY!
An hour later it’s bedtime and Laylee won’t stop crying
“I can’t go to bed. Mommy said we could all have a cow. I want a cow. Can we go to the store and get a cow? I want a pink cow. Daddy, do you want a white cow and mommy do you want a pink cow like me? Let’s all have a cow. Please. I don’t want to go to bed………WAAAAAHHHHH”
Luckily DY Dad saved the day with a great old trick called, “Let’s-pretend-this-pink-doll-jamma-is-a-pink-cow-and-eat-you-and-tickle-you-all-over-with-it-until-you-forget-why-you-were-in-fact-having-a-cow.”