I have sad news friends. After less than 7 years of marriage I have parted ways with my wedding bands.
I came home from my trip and found that my purse was absolutely crammed with dirt, crumbs and mysterious chunks of mystery. I removed all the non-trash items and shook the bag vigorously over the trash can to remove the rest of the grime.
Then this Friday I realized my fingers had un-swole after returning to the Pacific North West. For some reason the always swell up like melons when we go visit family in Utah. So I went to get my wedding bands out of the zipper compartment of my purse and found it unzipped and empty.
Suddenly I remembered that over a week ago I had dumped all the “trash” out into the garbage can. I’m 99% sure the rings went with it. So off they go to a landfill somewhere. Two more pieces of metal that will never be recycled.
I’m sick about the loss but Dan says, “Everyone makes mistakes.” Marrying him was not one of them.
Oh, I’m so sorry. I know that sick in the pit of your stomach feeling all too well. Blerg.
how terribly sad. My father lost his ring when my parents had been married for over 20 years. I remember how crushed he was.
Being pregnant, I’m a bit swollen, so hubs gave me a band to wear in a bigger size (we have been married barely a year, i couldn’t go ringless) and I left it at the pregnancy massage place last week! even then I was crushed and they even had it and held it for me.
a portion of the replacement cost may be covered under your homeowner’s insurance if you didn’t have separate jewelry insurance.
Oh, serious ouch. My husband temporarily lost his ring the first summer we were married, and that feeling is so awful. I only ever wear my band anymore because I’m terrified the diamond is going to fall out of my engagement ring after my birds loosened it up, so I can imagine how awful it is to have them be gone for real.
Oh no, I am so sorry Kathryn. I’ll keep my fingers crossed in the off chance that they’ll show up somewhere . . . somehow and get themselves back to you and Dan.
sarah k. says
Now, if Dan had been in the unzippered pocket, and had been shaken into the trash only to be missed a week later, that would definitely be a tragedy. Because you’re so right, that wasn’t a mistake. You’re right, they’re just metal. Though I was pretty sad for the few days I thought I had lost my wedding ring, so I know how you feel.
Oh. Oh, you poor thing. I know that icky feeling too.
I will keep my fingers crossed they show up somewhere.
The Lazy Organizer says
I’m so sorry! I would be sick about it too. I am the worst at losing jewelry. I cannot believe I have held onto my wedding ring for 12 years! My husband “lost” his wedding band but found it again at the bottom of his work bag a couple years later. At least you don’t go two years without cleaning out your bag!
Ohhh. Sooo saaad.
i am sick for you so sad!!
Ack. That’s awful! But you still have what matters, right?
Rocks In My Dryer says
Oh, I’m so sorry. That would just make me sick.
Oh Kathryn! I am so sorry! That is a bummer.
Awesome Mom says
Aww bummer! It is great that he has been so understanding. I don’t even wear a ring. I can’t stand to wear stuff on my hands and wrists. I tried super hard for over a year, but I kept taking them off and I knew that eventually they would end up like your rings if I did not keep them in a safe place.
Bless that man! So glad he is so understanding.
When I saw the picture and you started on the story, I thought “uh oh!”
This is one of those times when I’m sorry to say that I was right…
Dan is a very good catch indeed. And now you get to look forward to some new bling some day. (I’m just trying to find a bright side, Kathryn. I’d be bummed too – like when I lost on of the diamond earrings that Mr. Right bought me for our first anniversary. I’m still sad about it at times.)
Ugh. My heart hurts for you.
So sorry you lost your rings – but WOW what a great man you have!!
That’s when I’d heard my mother’s voice saying, “I guess you just can’t have nice things!” Argggggggh!
Don’t beat yourself up about.
This is an OPPORTUNITY! a SHOPPING ONE!
Oh, how awful. I have thought that I lost my ring before but I always found it. Try not to obsess about it too much; you still have your man!
I’m so sorry. I’m not married (only 17-:) so I can’t imagine the pain but I know it must be hard. 2 weeks ago my mom also lost her wedding rings. My dad had just given her new one’s to replace the one’s that had been cut off or lost. We are quite sure they are in our freezer somewhere. But 3 searches have revealed nothing. My mom like you feels terrible.
Oh, I am just sick for you.
Oh honey… I’m so sorry. Please don’t throw Dan out, though, he sounds like a keeper. 😉
Worlds Greatest Mommy says
Oh man, I’m so sorry. I know that loss will get to you, but I’m glad you have the guy! It could be fun to pick out new ring, although I’m sure you’ll never be able to replace the memories of the originals.
Ugh!! I’m so sorry. I would feel just sick, too.
What a good hubby you have, though.
Pam in Utah says
Oh, sorry about that! I am currently wearing an inexpensive band we got at Shopko or somewhere, for not too much, as it’s in-between the largeness I was and the skinnyness that will be (and that was at first). And, it will stay on in the pool AND come off later. Sorry about that, again!
I’m so sorry! How sad.
When you get another, it would be great to do something special surrounding its purchase and first placement on your finger so you have new, special memories with that band of metal, too.
(My totally non-sentimental husband lost his a few years ago, and it didn’t faze him a bit. Maybe the sadness is a girl thing…)
So sad and so sorry!!
I was so worried when I saw the title … at least it’s only the bands, right?
Scout's Honor says
Oh, shoot. Well, we make lemonade and say, hmmmm, let’s renew our marriage vows and perhaps renew the sparkle in our marriage symbolically by adding a carat here and a crat there?
I’ve been thinking a new diamond would be nice. We are so much more financially well off than when we married in college.
So, life gives you lemons and all that….
Bummer. I feel sick to my stomach for you. What a sweet husband you have.
Queen of Shake Shake says
Oh, that’s hard! I lost my wedding band too, and even though it was a skinny thing and I had a new anniversary wrap for my engagement ring, it was the sentimental value that can’t be replaced.
sweet mama entropy says
That is so horrible! I can’t even imagine. Hope you start feeling better about it soon.
Oh how crappy!
Ya’ know, you could always go the Pamela Anderson route & just have “Dan’s” tattooed around your ring finger….then you won’t have to worry about Utah related swelling.
We got new rings for our 10th anniversary last fall. I love mine (it’s Tungsten Carbide). Husband never wears his…go figure.
My original ones (including my engagement ring) are packed away, but I occasionally have an unfounded panic attack thinking they’re lost.
I think Scout’s Honor has a good idea…especially the add a carat part. Say, one carat a year since you were married….I’m sure Dan will go for it!
That is sad. I am so sorry. I HATE when that happens–and I bet you’d be surprised at how often it does.
Amy R. says
I am getting that sick feeling just thinking about it. So sorry.
Oh, that’s so sad! I’m so sorry.
Proud Daughter of Eve says
Whoooo boy. I’m so sorry! I know that dizzy, “Oh, no, I DIDN’T” feeling all too well. I lost the “promicse” diamond earrings my husband gave me when we were dating. I found them about a year and one move later in a drawer, in a little jewler’s box, but I felt so horrible until then!
You’ve got small people in your house. Maybe one of them has squirrled them away as treasures?
Oh, I’m so sorry. That’s really awful, but it’s so easy to do those things. Hope you get a nice replacement soon!
Oh, I’m so sorry!
I remember the feeling when my husband and I were out on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico and he dipped up some water to wash the sunscreen off his hands and we heard that “plunk” and watched the last flash as his wedding band drifted to the bottom of the ocean.
Maybe Laylee could make you some out of toilet paper? (LOL at the previous post)
It is just a symbol, just a thing like you said, and the love that you and Dan share is what is real. Those two beautiful people you made together are proof of that.
Ugh, that hurts. It’s kind of amazing we manage to hold onto these little bits of metal at all, isn’t it? I have only one ring at the moment (engagment) and I get scared in the winter when my fingers shrink in the cold and it gets loose. I’m glad your husband is comforting, but still, that hurts.
I had misplaced mine for over a year……thought I lost them in the move. I was even on ebay lookin’ at fakey replacements. The next morning I found them.
Hopefully that 99% leaves for 1% of they fell out next to the trash and Laylee stashed them for you in the couch. not in the trash.
You can always go on a date and pretend you are getting married for the first time again. Trying on all new rings…..Ok that was what comforted me. You can even have a new “ring” ceremony. Invite friends and fam and have a party. And a wee ceremony. … another thing that comforted me (family and friends/party, food) Seven years is for sure something to have a party over.
Lani from The Wooden Porch says
How horrible!! I thought you were announcing something much, much worse at first.
My dad never took his ring off and as the years went by his hands grew until his ring cut off his circulation and he had to have it cut off. The ring I mean, not his finger.
so sad. i suppose if you have the money for a new one, it might be fun to shop again. still, i would be so bummed. i like that you said that marrying dan is not one of your mistakes. so sweet.
So glad you still have the picture at least.
Lost my diamond at a Levitz furniture outlet store. They thought I was a crazy loon crawling all over the carpets. Never found it. Now I just wear a cheap oddly deformed tourist ring we bought at a castle in Denmark. I’m waiting for the kids to grow up before I start begging for a real one.
Dan’s great for taking it so well.
I think the kids should paint marker rings on you guys. My girls are always painting one’s on their fingers.
I’m so sorry you lost your rings. That pit-of-the-stomach feeling is the worst, when you would give anything to go back and do something different and you can’t.
Thankfully, it is just two small pieces of metal you feel that way about.
I feel your pain. I had put my engagement ring and wedding band on my watch and had it clasped shut to keep them all together. Well, my then 18 month old found them and that was the last I saw of my rings. He was going through a phase of throwing things in the trash can at that point, and that’s the only place I can figure he would have put them. Of course, that did not occur to me (to check the trash) until it was way too late. That was 10 years ago. My dh also lost his wedding band while he was working… in a manhole… knee deep in water and mud.
Dh bought me a very nice anniversary band soon after that. I have been much more careful with it, too!
I’m sorry for your mishap. Maybe they’ll turn up after all? 🙂
Oh no! I’m so sorry! And Dan is awesome.
Though I would like to take mine off (have them cleaned and such) I am not at all confident that they will come off at this point, even with the application of soap and cold, cold water. Sigh.
Oh no! I did that once, but all I did was put my hand down in a crowded bar and it slid right off. I felt worse because it had been handed down from my mother…..
And that is one sweet hubby.
Oh my word! That is so terrible! I would not be able to console myself. I hope you can!!
I’m with Proud Daughter of Eve; maybe one of your small people has them and is the reason that pocket was unzipped. What with all the hullabaloo that must have surrounded noticing them gone I bet it would be hard to say, “No, I have them.” I know it’s not nearly the same, but I thought I lost my keys for 3 days. I looked EVERYWHERE and even at the grocery store where I know I had them last (searched under cars in the parking lot, bugged them about their Lost and Found twice). Then I opened up a backpack that I use for spare kids’ clothes when we are out on long trips and there they were. I know I didn’t have that with me at the grocery store. How did they get there? Who knows.
Don’t give up hope (even if you get a replacement under the fabulous carat/year plan)!
Oh, and YAY! Forward and backwards links at the top again!
I did almost this same thing a month or so ago. My fingers were swollen so I took the rings off and placed them in the zipper part of my wallet and then at a gas station, I paid with the correct change, forgot to rezip and poof. They were gone. Unfortunately, the diamond engagement ring had been in my husband’s family for many years. I was devastated but he was so sweet and understanding. Sounds like we both married sweethearts 🙂