Thank you so much for all the heartwarming smiles you gave me as I walked through the store on Saturday. I was wearing makeup, cute shoes and an “outfit” and walking with an unmistakable mom-on-the-loose-for-the-weekend swagger. Your grins only confirmed my perception of my own hot-ishness.
I plan to drop-kick you all later.
Because the cute elderly checker at Barnes and Noble was kind, helpful but also honest. When I walked up to the counter and plunked down my copy of A Girl Named Zippy, she smiled, told me how much she liked the book and informed me that my zipper was gaping open.
Yes friends. If you think it would have been embarrassing to tell me to XYZ at Target, just imagine how I felt an hour later when the sweet lady laughed and said, “I just had to tell you. With the title of the book and your zipper open like that, it just really caught my attention.”
Seeing as I’m not currently pregnant and therefore don’t frequent public restrooms for the fun of it, I know that I had been flying low throughout all of my errands. Suddenly your smiles seem more sinister and my hotness a little less secure. At least that lady will think fondly of me every time she passes a copy of Zippy in the stacks.
She’s probably blogging it right now.