She took a bunch of drugs.Â
Feel free to head on over and congratulate her.
One of the things I learned working in the media department of a public library with a massive film collection was that people like scaring the living chigooly out of themselves on or around October 31st.Â What many people learned the hard way was that if you go to a video store or library the day before or the day of Halloween, you’ll have to be a little more creative when choosing a scary flick to watch….
We live near Seattle.Â We’re close enough that the commute is decent but far enough into the nowhere that we’d be more likely to go cow-tipping than clubbing on a typical Thursday night.Â
We have a slightly smaller public market than the big city, slightly more people dressed as giant cornstalks in the Fourth of July parade and our newspaper is much quirkier than the big city variety.
In my local paper you will find a section called Police Beat, eerily similar to the section of the same name in my college paper.Â …
I “borrowed” a handful of washable tattoos from the mommybloggers at BlogHer this summer and mailed them out to about 30 of you.Â These 30 sworeÂ by blood oath to send me pictures of themselves wearing said tatts.Â Here are the results.
The Hall of Fame
(Aiyaiyai! Check out these hot mamas!)…
Magoo has become addicted to string “cheece.”Â After 2 string cheeces yesterday, I had a hard time explaining to Laylee why I was rejecting his pitiful cries for more cheece.Â The bowels, the stoppage.Â Dude, mom.Â It’s just cheece.
I explained ad nauseum about variety and how our bodies will only grow healthy and strong if we eat a lot of different foods.Â If we eat the same thing every meal we’ll die a hideous constipated death, etc.
Laylee:Â Okay then.Â What’s for dinner?
Me:Â Oh.Â I’m making cheese sandwiches.
Yes I did.Â
No she didn’t.
But if she had, I would have explained that cheese sandwiches use orange cheese, which might as well be from a different planet than string “cheece.”Â They’re not even pronounced the same.
Yesterday evening as Laylee evacuated her bowels prior to retiring for the night to her bedchamber, she informed me that she was “goin’ to the pod.”
Me:Â Oh, really?
Laylee:Â Yeah, I’m goin’ to the “pod” because, well, I’m sitting on the pod-EE.Â So, it’s like I’m goin’ to the “pod.”Â Yeah, it’s like that.Â
I will grant you that around our abode, I frequently speak highly of Dan’s “bod” and it only stands to reason that over time, she would pick up this colloquial abbreviation and begin to incorporate it into casual speech with her peers.Â However, she seems quite puerile to be adapting adult lexicon in such a creative fashion.
On that self-same day, she had me quite enraptured with a detailed treatise on the etiquette of flatulence and the spasmodic ejection of stomach gases.Â According to Laylee’s hypothesis, the idiom “excuse me” must only be directed at a specific personage if the nature of the emission is noxious in its pungency.Â Otherwise, the plea for pardon should merely be expressed to the world as a whole, no actual apology being needful as no one person has received harm.
The spiders of Washington State have teamed up with the haunted forest behind my house to ensure a spooky good time for everyone who lives here.Â Giant spider webs stretch from every tree, column and fence post around our yard.Â In the morning, the dew clings to them, making them appear thick, white and stiff.Â
Sitting in the center of each web is a huge female spider who, according to a thoroughly freaked out woman in Target, will do anything AN-Y-THING to get inside my house or crawlspace and lay her bazillions of eggs at this season of the year.Â I used to get excited when one of the spiders disappeared from the yard.Â Now I find it moderately disturbing….
Dan’s family left us this morning while I slept.Â I miss them already.Â The 3 day visit seemed too short and disorganized.Â We didn’t plan ahead what we would do or talk to them about their expectations for the trip.Â So when it came time to go do something, we’d sit around like the vultures in Jungle Book asking each other what we wanted to do until the sun went down and then we’d hang out some more, eat some food and stay up way too late….
I drove behind a semi-truck for a couple of miles that was either full of freshly cut evergreen trees or Vicks Vaporub.
I heard bells chime on a classical recording yesterday morning.
Last week I could see my breath….
What do you do to entertain your kids when they are too-sick-to-go-outside but not-sick-enough-to-lie-passively on-the-couch? Or when one is sick and the other is bored silly?
What are some alternatives to TV-watching for little kids (under three) when Mommy is too sick to do anything but lie on the couch?
These questions are brought to you by Keryn….